Apparently NBC is doing a contest called America's Favorite Mom. They break Moms down into different categories but the one that really has me really unhappy is the one called "Non-Mom Moms". Then it was changed to "Non-conventional Moms" now it's changed to "Adoptive Mom". Why the differences? Why pitting one Mom against another?? Those of us who are moms, aren't we just Moms??
They still forget to include Foster Moms and First Moms (as Maggie pointed out in an e-mail and I apologize to those of you reading this who are foster moms or First Moms or even adoptees).
Isn't a mom one who takes care of you whether you are in the womb or out of it?
A mom is one that cares for her child(ren) whether they are in their home or outside of it. A mom is one who no matter the distance will remember her child's birthday. A mom is one who is sad when their child is sad and is happy when their child is happy.
This mom has changed who knows how many diapers between the 3 kids and I'm not quite done yet.
This mom has bathed and clothed and fed and stayed up at night when they are sick one child for 3 years, another child for 2 years and one child for under a year.
This mom spent 3 mostly sleepless nights in a hospital room next to her daughter's bedside when she had a 104+ temp due to an infection which ravaged her little body when she was 10 months old.
This mom has taken her 3 kids to the doctors' office for checkups and sick visits.
This mom plays with her 3 kids day after day after day.
This mom doesn't get time off from her job because Stay at Home Mom is on the job 24 hours a day 7 days a week.
This mom is up until 1 am most nights working on housework and up at 7:30 the next morning.
This mom cooks and cleans for her family.
This mom teaches her kids manners and by age 2 had them saying please and thank you (although admittedly they need reminding every now and then).
This mom teaches her kids about Korea, tells them "their story", watches Korean children's videos and listens to Korean children's music and can sing London Bridges in Korean.
This mom is tired of the non-adoption community telling her that she is a "non-mom" or an "adoptive mom" and wishes that she could just have the classification of "mom" since that is what I am...a mom.
For those of you who need to see the definition of the word mother, here it is from Dictionary.com's website:
American Heritage Dictionary
moth·er (mŭth'ər) Noun
1.
a. A female person who is pregnant with or gives birth to a child.
b. A female person whose egg unites with a sperm, resulting in the conception of a child.
c. A woman who adopts a child.
d. A woman who raises a child.
e. A mother superior.
f. Used as a form of address for such a woman.
2. A female parent of an animal.
3. A female ancestor.
4. A woman who holds a position of authority or responsibility similar to that of a mother: a den mother.
5. Roman Catholic Church
a. A mother superior.
b. Used as a form of address for such a woman.
6. A woman who creates, originates, or founds something: "the discovery of radium, which made Marie Curie mother to the Atomic Age" (Alden Whitman).
7. A creative source; an origin: Philosophy is the mother of the sciences.
8. Used as a title for a woman respected for her wisdom and age.
9. Maternal love and tenderness: brought out the mother in her.
10. The biggest or most significant example of its kind: the mother of all battles.
11. Vulgar Slang Something considered extraordinary, as in disagreeableness, size, or intensity.
Please read definition 1C and 1D that pertains to the "adoptive" moms. 1A and 1B could refer to the First Moms, and 1D could refer to the Foster Moms as well. All three of us fall into the meaning 9 of Maternal love and tenderness.
On the America’s Favorite Mom website that I gave you above, look at Jennifer Keller and her bio. They separate out the biological child from the adopted children she is a mother to. I don’t know about what the adult adoptees think but why the segregation?? It doesn’t seem right to this mom.
While I sit here and think about me being called a "The Non-Mom Mom" this morning, a "Non-Conventional Mom" this afternoon, and a "The Adopting Mom" this evening, I wonder if the media will ever get it right and just refer to me as what I am, a Mom. And while they are at it, refer to my children for who they are my children.
~Jen, a mom to 3 kids
1 comment:
Well said, Jen. A couple of things struck me about the public apology - first, how quick it was, like they really weren't paying attention, said "oops" and think it's all fixed now; and second that they said in the email I got that they have adoptive parents on staff, including their president. Well, HELLO! Then how could they have let that happen?
Another mom I read pointed out something else: One of the bios referred mentioned that this particular mom had a daughter of "her own" and six adopted children who started life as "meth babies" (quotation marks theirs). Gee, way to respect those six children!
Thanks for speaking out!
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